TRC graduated from preschool today. He was very excited (they performed a play–he was a frog. Again.), but he was also really sad. Sad because it had come to an end and “he’d never get to go to preschool again.” I tried to comfort him: reassure him that he’d still see his friends, and that Kindergarten would be fun, too. At the same time, though, I couldn’t help but think that this is something he has to learn to deal with. I’ve never been a good one for good byes. I like to keep them short, because they make me uncomfortable. There are probably deep seated psychological reasons for this, but you don’t want to read about this, and I don’t want to write about it. Suffice it to say, I could relate to him. For a long time, I hated watching family videos, just because I didn’t like to be reminded of what was past and could never be recovered. They still make me kind of depressed, although I can handle them now. This isn’t to say by any means that I’m not happy in the present. It’s more that I wish I could be happy in the present and still get back the past and be happy there, too.
I know that makes no sense.
In any case, I think he’s recuperating well. The thing that I’ve found that helps the most is to remember that today’s present will be tomorrow’s past. It’s a lot easier to deal with the loss of yesterday if I know that I spent that time well.
Okay–clearly I’m feeling too retrospective right now. I have no right to be posting when I’m in this condition. That is all.